Why do so many romantic love poems and phrases sound like heart disease? "You stole my heart" and "my heart skips a beat" may sound exciting, but when taken literally, some of these heart idioms are not romantic at all -- in fact they are outright disturbing! Let's look at them...
1. Be still my heart
Yes, metaphorically speaking, "You make my heart stand still" is a very romantic idea. The problem with your heart standing still is that blood will cease to flow throughout your body. Your cells won't get oxygen and nutrients and carbon dioxide won't be removed and exhaled. From a medical standpoint, this is straight-up cardiac arrest and without that defibrillator, you're dead.
2. You make my heart skip a beat
That's either arrhythmia or premature ventricular contractions -- get yourself to a cardiologist, STAT. (Psst, if you need something free for your My Funny Valentine, we have free downloadable med-geek valentine cards here.)
3. You stole my heart
First of all, only dead people can donate organs. If you steal someone's actual heart, either they're dead, or you're a serial killer.
4. You hold my heart in your hands
Again, if this is happening you're either a heart surgeon, cardiac nurse, transplant co-ordinator or a total psychopath.
5. I have a soft spot in my heart for you
The heart is a muscle, and let's be real -- soft muscles are not a good thing! The medical word for having a soft spot in your heart is called cardiomyopathy, when the heart muscle becomes weak and makes the pumping work less efficiently. Sure, our heart plushy may be soft and squishy, but that's not what you want in your real actual heart!
6. I'll give you my heart.
Again, sounds really cool and dramatic -- but this is quite literally a bad idea! You need your heart. Besides, you can inly get a heart donated from a cadaver, so again, if you're in love with a dead person, that called either unrequited love or necrophilia and we don't recommend either.
So before you pour your heart out, follow your heart to the right place (if your heart's in the wrong place that's called dextrocardia, just FYI), and that's our heart-filled website, where you'll find heart-stopping cute cardiac goodies plus everything your lil' heart desires.
No matter what condition your heart is in -- either physically or romantically -- please know the whole I Heart Guts team loves you with our whole hearts!