Who eats keys, puzzle pieces, screws, combs, and little plastic army men? Is it your kid? Your dog? Nope, it's Hard To Swallow, another gutsy gem of a tee on Threadless by Mushonastick, who writes, "Confuse friends and future archaeologists with this tee that proudly displays a small but confusing collection of swallowed artifacts (exaggerated anatomy notwithstanding)."